3 Goodbyes; a therapeutic post

This post is just me processing that I just had three goodbyes in the last two days.

The first goodbye followed a hello, as most do, just 10 days ago. Our friend, and owner of the house, flew back to Germany for a conference and was able to stay with us for a few days. It was wonderful spending time with her and catching up as if she had only been gone two weeks instead of months. But then her trip was over, and she flew back to America, to her family, and the remaining months of their year in the States. She was happier to go this time than she was in summer. Instead of heading off into an unknown, or a partly unknown, she was returning. But I stayed, and I was not any happier to see her go this time than I was in the summer.

This weekend was the graduation for the seminary students. It was a fun-filled weekend celebrating the graduates accomplishments, especially those of my friend and housemate. Her new job is a few hours south of here, which in American standards is not really so far away, but for Germans, might as well be another country (actually, another country is closer to my town than her new town). I have only known her a year and a half, and honestly, I am jealous of the friends that knew her longer or better. Egoistic of me, I know, but it's true. We will visit, she will visit. And of course we will 'see' each other on Facebook and even Skype. But that is not the same as watching an episode of Friends together just because we were both at home, or meeting up for a quick coffee. That was the second goodbye.

The third goodbye is right now.

This morning I unpacked some bags sitting in the hall closest from when I moved in two months ago. In two of the bags were heavy winter jackets Adam and I left here over 4 years ago, when we thought we only had one more winter to spend in the States and knew we could survive a Charlotte winter without them. Since that winter, I have bought myself another winter jacket. So I let the bags be. Until this morning. I need to give his jacket away. I don't need it, and it's too big and heavy for me anyway. But that means goodbye again. It's just a jacket, I know, and I already have a few special things of his I have kept.... like his college sweatshirt that he sprayed with his cologne before he left for his semester abroad... like his high school drama t-shirts, that somewhere along the road in our marriage I took as my own as night shirts... like all the photos and memories I have of him. This is just a jacket. It's in good condition, and will keep someone very warm. So, goodbye jacket. May you make someone feel as warm, comforted, protected, and happy as your former wearer made me feel.